"Premature Parenting": Dear Torrie

Dear Torrie,

Today you are officially 10 months old. something about this seems weird to me, so many things have happened in such a short ten months that mommy doesn't even know where to start.

Lets start with the basics,
Mommy is so so proud of how far you've come- there a side of me that sighs with relief everyday that you grow to become more like an average 10 month old and let a little bit of your premature habits disappear. although you cant crawl yet, you sure do know how to get to where you want to go, you always find someone that will come pick you up and you just point to where you want to be.
you have also become quite the little eater. Mommy is still very afraid to let you try things but you scream until mommy lets you have just one little bite and your cute little dimples just make my heart melt and i let you have a little nibble here and there and cross my fingers that your belly wont hurt later.

Now that your plump (22 lbs) the doctor has allowed me to take you off all your special diets, which means you can now eat like a normal baby! yay! this is exciting and bitter sweet because that means your growing up and my baby girl isn't such a baby anymore.

I don't even think i have to tell you how much i love you, but i will- I love you so much that when I'm away from you my heart aches. you know mommy works a busy job but sometimes during the day mommy gets a minute to just sit, and do you know what happens? mommy gets so anxious and excited that i just need to be near you and see you, but that cant happen and it makes mommy sad.

The other thing that makes mommy sad is that one day from now we will be celebrating your last "first" holiday. i cannot believe it. i mean that- i actually cannot believe that.
you are so big its so hard to cradle and rock you, and daddy feels the same way.

speaking of daddy, i want you to know that he loves you, even tho he isn't there everyday and sometimes acts funny, he loves you, you are his little princess and daddy is doing everything he can to get better to be there for you everyday. and mommy is sorry that we are a stupid statistic, that mommy is a single parent, and daddy is "no good" but you and I know that daddy is sick and once he gets better we will be together again.

Torrie you are meeting many mile stones and mommy is so so proud.

you are almost crawling. you really try to chase mom out of the room when I leave
you are trying very hard to copy words and sounds
you love love love music just like your Nana and daddy and you dance all the time
you can reach and grab for the things you want.
you can roll in all directions and you can sit by yourself
you are starting to eat "people food"
you really really like to eat. when i send you to school i send enough for two babies and you eat it all!!
you love mommy, you never let me out of your sight, and you always prefer that i hold you over everyone else, and as much as i complain i am secretly so excited inside.
you are starting to become shy around strangers or people we don't see all the time.
you are the only child in this house of adults and you LOVE all the attention you get.
you like to take rides around the house in your "car"
you laugh the most when you play with daddy, and you look the most like him!